You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
