also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize