It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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