quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
