i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
