I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
