I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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