I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Randomize
