I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Hello my rib-scented angel!
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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