just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
