a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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