One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Randomize
