Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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