addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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