so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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