I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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