It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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