haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
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