Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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