Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
