rhymes with "ouble enetration"
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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