I wanna bring you to show and tell
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
