maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
