Where did you get a picture of my penis
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
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