She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize