And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I fill condoms, not promises.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
