remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
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