Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize