also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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