He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize