Do you still have your period?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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