thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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