And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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