i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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