My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
