We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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