Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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