I haven't been this sober since birth.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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