Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
