After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
wow bdsm is so cute
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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