i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
