Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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