This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
