I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
