i just google imaged poop.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
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