playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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