Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
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