conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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