she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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