i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
